Hadi Wijaya
The discourse surrounding the childfree lifestyle—a conscious decision to remain childless—has once again surged to the forefront of Indonesian public debate, prompted by controversial remarks from digital influencer and YouTuber Gita Savitri, commonly known as Gitasav. The Germany-based influencer recently sparked a firestorm of social media commentary by suggesting that not having children serves as a "natural anti-aging" remedy, allowing her to maintain a youthful appearance and a stress-free lifestyle. In response to the viral nature of this ideology, Ustazah Tria Meriza, the founder of @sekolahmuslimah.bahagia, has issued a comprehensive critique of the childfree movement from the perspective of Islamic jurisprudence and social ethics.
According to Ustazah Tria, the adoption of a childfree ideology is considered "haram" (forbidden) for Muslim couples based on four primary theological and sociological grounds. Her analysis posits that the movement is not merely a personal lifestyle choice but a manifestation of broader ideological shifts that conflict with the fundamental tenets of Sharia law. The debate highlights a growing tension in Indonesia—a nation with the world’s largest Muslim population—between traditional family values and modern, individualistic lifestyles often imported from Western societies.
The Chronology of the Controversy
The current wave of debate began in early February 2023 when Gitasav responded to a comment on her Instagram account praising her youthful looks at the age of 30. Her response, which attributed her appearance to the absence of children, was widely perceived as a dismissal of the value of motherhood. She argued that without children, she could sleep eight hours a day, avoid the stress of parenting, and maintain financial resources for cosmetic upkeep.
This statement immediately went viral, drawing sharp criticism from various segments of Indonesian society, including celebrities, religious leaders, and parenting advocates. While Gitasav has long been open about her decision to be childfree, her recent framing of the choice as a biological advantage for women’s aesthetics struck a chord in a culture where children are traditionally viewed as "amanah" (a trust from God) and "rezeki" (a blessing).
In the wake of this controversy, religious educators like Ustazah Tria Meriza have sought to clarify the Islamic stance on the matter. Through her digital platforms, Tria emphasized that the childfree movement is an ideological export that requires careful scrutiny through the lens of faith.
The Theological Framework: Four Pillars of Opposition
Ustazah Tria Meriza’s argument against the childfree lifestyle is structured around four central points that address the origin, the motivation, and the scriptural contradictions of the movement.
1. The Roots in Secularism and Materialism
The first point raised by Ustazah Tria is that the childfree ideology was born out of Western secularism, which advocates for the separation of religious values from private life and family planning. In a secular framework, decisions are often made based on the "utility principle"—calculating what provides the most immediate personal benefit or pleasure.
"This ideology considers things only based on the principle of benefit, not on the basis of what is ‘halal’ (permissible) or ‘haram’ (forbidden)," Tria explained. From an Islamic perspective, life and its milestones, including marriage and procreation, are governed by divine law rather than individualistic pragmatism. By prioritizing personal comfort over the potential for parenthood, Tria argues that proponents of the childfree movement are inadvertently adopting a worldview that marginalizes the role of the Creator in human affairs.
2. Financial Anxiety and the Concept of Sustenance
A second common justification for the childfree choice is the fear of financial instability or the high cost of raising a child in the modern world. Tria asserts that this fear directly contradicts the Islamic "akidah" (creed). In Islam, it is a fundamental belief that Allah is Ar-Razzaq (The Provider) and that every soul brought into the world comes with its own guaranteed "rezeki" (sustenance).
The Quran explicitly addresses the fear of poverty in relation to children. Tria’s argument aligns with the teachings found in Surah Al-Isra (17:31), which states: "And do not kill your children for fear of poverty. We provide for them and for you." While this verse refers to the pre-Islamic practice of infanticide, scholars apply its logic to the modern prevention of children based solely on economic anxiety, viewing it as a lack of trust in divine providence.
3. Contradiction of the Core Purpose of Marriage
The third argument focuses on the "Maqasid al-Sharia" (the objectives of Islamic law) regarding marriage. Tria points out that one of the primary pillars and purposes of an Islamic marriage is to continue the human lineage. She references Surah An-Nahl (16:72), which states: "And Allah has made for you from yourselves mates and has made for you from your mates sons and grandchildren and has provided for you from the good things."
From this perspective, intentionally and permanently closing the door to offspring without a valid medical or pressing reason is seen as a subversion of the very institution of marriage as defined by the Quran. While Islam allows for family planning and the spacing of births (known as "azl" or modern contraception) for the health of the mother or the well-being of the family, the total and permanent rejection of children as a lifestyle choice is viewed as a departure from the prophetic model.
4. The Prophetic Encouragement for a Large Ummah
The final reason provided by Ustazah Tria is the explicit encouragement from the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) for his followers to marry and have children. She cited a well-known Sahih Hadith (narrated by Abu Daud, an-Nasa’i, and Ahmad): "Marry the women who are loving and fertile, for I will boast of your great numbers before the other nations on the Day of Resurrection."
This tradition emphasizes that the strength and vitality of the Muslim community (Ummah) are tied to its growth and the nurturing of the next generation. By choosing to be childfree, Tria argues that a couple is opting out of a communal and religious aspiration to contribute to the growth of the Ummah. "Banyak anak itu menyenangkan" (Having many children is joyful), she remarked, attempting to counter the narrative that children are merely a burden or a source of premature aging.
Demographic Data and the Indonesian Context
The debate over the childfree lifestyle is not occurring in a vacuum; it coincides with shifting demographic trends in Indonesia. Data from the Indonesian Central Bureau of Statistics (BPS) indicates a gradual decline in the Total Fertility Rate (TFR) over the last several decades. In the 1970s, the TFR was approximately 5.6, whereas by 2022, it had dropped to around 2.1, which is the replacement level.
While Indonesia is not yet facing the "demographic collapse" seen in East Asian neighbors like South Korea or Japan, the emergence of the childfree discourse has alarmed some government officials. Dr. Hasto Wardoyo, the head of the National Population and Family Planning Board (BKKBN), has expressed concern that if the childfree trend gains significant traction among the younger generation, Indonesia could face a shrinking productive-age population in the future.
The BKKBN has been promoting the "Golden Indonesia 2045" vision, which relies on a "demographic dividend"—a period where the working-age population outnumbers dependents. A widespread shift toward childfree lifestyles could potentially jeopardize this economic trajectory by leading to an aging population and a labor shortage.
Institutional and Societal Reactions
The response to the childfree movement in Indonesia has been overwhelmingly conservative. The Indonesian Ulema Council (MUI) has previously stated that while the timing of having children can be managed, the philosophy of "childfree" as a permanent rejection of children is inconsistent with Islamic values.
Dr. Asrorun Niam Sholeh, the MUI Chairman for Fatwa, noted in separate discussions that marriage in Islam is a "mithaqan ghalizha" (a strong covenant) that includes the responsibility of procreation and education of children. He argued that the childfree trend is often driven by "hedonistic individualism" that prioritizes personal pleasure over social and religious responsibility.
On the other side of the debate, some defenders of Gitasav and the childfree choice argue that the decision is a matter of bodily autonomy. They point to the "Sandwich Generation" phenomenon in Indonesia, where young adults are burdened with the financial support of both their parents and their own children, as a practical reason why some may choose to opt out of parenthood. They argue that it is more responsible to remain childless than to bring a child into a world where the parents are mentally or financially unprepared.
Analysis of Implications
The clash between Ustazah Tria’s traditionalist view and the childfree movement represents a significant cultural inflection point for Indonesia. Several implications arise from this ongoing discourse:
- Religious Reinterpretation: The debate is forcing a more nuanced discussion on the difference between "family planning" (which is widely accepted in Indonesia through the ‘Dua Anak Cukup’ program) and "childfree." Scholars are now tasked with defining the boundaries of permissible birth control versus the ideological rejection of parenthood.
- Gender Roles and Social Pressure: The childfree movement often highlights the disproportionate burden placed on women in child-rearing. By framing childlessness as "anti-aging," Gitasav touched on the societal pressure for women to remain youthful and the exhaustion that often accompanies motherhood in the absence of a strong support system.
- Economic Policy: If the trend continues to grow among urban, educated Indonesians, the government may need to transition from "population control" policies to "pro-natalist" policies, similar to those in Singapore or Hungary, offering incentives for couples to have children.
- Social Fabric: The traditional Indonesian family structure relies on children to care for parents in their old age. A shift toward childfree living would necessitate a massive overhaul of social security and elderly care systems, as the family-based safety net would begin to dissolve.
Conclusion
Ustazah Tria Meriza’s critique serves as a reminder of the deep-seated religious and cultural values that continue to define Indonesian society. While the digital age allows for the rapid spread of global trends like the childfree movement, these ideas face significant resistance when they encounter the theological and social structures of a predominantly Muslim nation.
The discourse initiated by Gitasav and countered by figures like Tria Meriza is likely only the beginning of a long-term conversation about the meaning of family, the rights of the individual, and the future of the Indonesian nation. As the country navigates its path toward 2045, the balance between modern personal choices and traditional communal responsibilities remains one of its most complex challenges. For now, the consensus among religious educators remains firm: the blessing of children is a cornerstone of faith, and the choice to reject it is a departure from both divine guidance and the natural order of human society.
